I can’t say for sure why it is (I blame it on coupled-up person’s guilt) but married or attached friends of single girls seem to always make it their mission in life to give heaps of advice about how to catch a man. And while their intentions are usually really well-meaning, this abundance of unsolicited advice can be annoying and completely unhelpful.
Quite frankly the biggest favor you can do your single friends is to set them up with someone. If that’s not an option then simply continue being the awesome friend that you are because awesome friends are something that every single gal needs.
In order to keep on being an awesome friend, keep the following off putting suggestions to yourself;
1. “Stop being so picky!”
Um, excuse me? (That’s me pretending I’m single and you just said that to me.) Okay, reality check: girls can be too picky. Everyone can be too picky. Dumping a guy because his hair did this weird thing in a certain light that one time? Too picky. But you can’t say that to someone because what they hear is,”You should settle. You don’t deserve / will never find everything you want.”
As an alternative, give her specific instances where she might have been a bit hasty in cutting ties with someone. Point out that good relationships are forgiving of flaws.
2. “You need to relax it a bit”
What is your friend hearing when you say this? She will almost always interpret this piece of advice as you implying that women with strong personalities are too intimidating to find a man and that she either has to choose being a successful, assertive individual or being happy in a relationship.
What she wants is someone who will respect and love her for her strengths. Instead, try pointing out that there is a fine line between being independent and being unapproachable.
3. “Suck it up and move on”
When your friend is going through a breakup she’ll go through a period of time when she’s bummed out, lonely and full of regret (think back to your single days, remember?). While it doesn’t make her the most fun to hang out with she deserves your patience and understanding. After all, she’d do the same for you if the situation was reversed.
It’s not your responsibility to urge her to get back into the dating field before she feels she’s ready. We all heal in our own way, in our own good time. She doesn’t need you to push her out the door before she’s good and ready. What she does need is for you to be there as she makes her way back to the land of the living.
This post was developed by the writers of the Datepad.com internet dating company where you can find thousands of helpful dating posts.
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