Are you married to an alcoholic? Is your husband/wife a different person when they drink? Are you tired of the Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde Behavior? Are you at your wits end and just can’t take it anymore? What can you do?Stop trying to get your husband/wife to stop drinking.
It really doesn’t make any difference whatsoever, nagging on them to give up as all it leads to is making you emotionally stressed out and therefore less able to help that person who is so special to you. It is impossible to verbally over power an alcoholic as you need a delicate control over the situation. With this in mind you can reach inside an alcoholic and have some effect on their life.
You must always bear in mind that you are helping the person that you married and loved and not the alcoholic. Ignore them when they have got a drink inside them and they are looking for an argument and ignore any form of emotional nonsense. Make sure it sinks into them the fact that you will not be provoked when they are drunk and stick to your guns.
I guarantee you that they will be extremely persistent and will try everything in their power to break you down, but remain firm. Avoid confrontation at all times by going into a different room, going out for a walk or just putting on some headphones and listening to some music. You are the key to this and only you have the power to make them really see the problems they have.
It is a very sad fact that the person on the receiving end is as mentally and emotionally ill as the alcoholic himself. This is why the innocent party must set their own limits for what they are going to take from their partner while they are drunk.
The most important thing to remember when they get drunk and they start to irritate you is that you don’t get emotional at all and certainly don’t react to their bait, as they are just waiting for you to respond on their level. Just walk away and try to just look right through them in a vein attempt to focus on the person in them that you used to love.
Don’t help the alcoholic by enabling their addictive behaviour. Don’t help them to bed. Don’t let them drive while drinking. Do not let them argue, fuss or fight with you while they are drinking. Do not talk to them, leave the house or room and shut and lock the door behind you. Do not buy them alcohol, even if they beg you to. Don’t treat them any differently because they have a drinking problem. Don’t give them any special attention while they are drinking.
When the alcoholic in your life is sober, give them extra special attention. Tell them how much you love them, but not the disease. Talk to them about your new boundaries when they are sober. Write them on the refrigerator so they can’t say they forgot. Basically let them know all the bad and awful things they do to you and the rest of the family while they are drinking. They need to know.
All these points will make life living with an alcoholic just that little bit more easier and it will aid the burden of their abuses towards you. Sadly in a way you are not alone and you can discover other peoples experiences at the stopdrinkingadvice.org blog and it will soon come to light that your world can change and your partner too.
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