Great relationships don’t just happen. Both partners should work to make it happen. And “work” is the right term, since it’s not always easy and smooth sailing. Even when you deeply love each other, there are times when you will be at loggerheads. This is normal. But you can strive to keep a clean slate, so that the disagreements don’t pile up and cause deeper problems in your relationship.
The first step is to sit down and talk about common points of disagreements. The usual sources of quarrels would be money, house chores, sex and a lack of communication. When both of the partners have discussed these matters, it would be easy to refer back to what you both have agreed upon when things get heated up. It’s really difficult to think in a logical manner when you are angry.
Here are a few things you can do to ward off relationship problems even before they rear their ugly head:
Communication is key. Talk is definitely not cheap when it comes to strengthening relationships. When partners talk about their thoughts and share what they feel with their partner, it opens up avenues by which you can forge deeper ties. Sometimes, because of the everyday business of life, partners fail to communicate. Schedule appointments by which you can talk with each other. And when you are communicating, set some rules for you to follow. Don’t generalize - avoid using the words “you always” or “you never”.
Make sex a priority. Sex is important for the relationship, although men and women have different needs. Both partners should be aware of the other’s needs so that he or she can consciously make the efforts to meet these. Again, make an appointment for some loving. Learn what your partner finds sexy and try to fulfill your partner’s sexual fantasies.
Agree about Finances. Work out a budget together - include savings. Discuss how monthly bills are to be settled. Give each other “space” - there should be a certain amount that each one can spend at his or her discretion. Be honest with each other about your debt and income. Agree about short-term and long-term goals for the family.
Organize household chores. Responsibilities around the house should be threshed out so that everybody knows what is expected of them when it comes to chores. The division should be fair and equitable, so that there should be no feelings of resentment cropping up.
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