Do you find yourself in a confusing situation where either your or a cherished partner are have extended the proper bounds to your relationship? Or at least, you strongly suspect so? Has a flirtation perhaps gone a bit too far? How do you define a betrayal? If sex isn’t involved is it possible for anyone to really be betrayed. If you are asking these type of questions, you may be going through an emotional infidelity.
Emotional infidelity defined: it is when one part of a committed relationship is emotionally involved with another person without sex being a part of it. The emotion is still there. The longing is still there. And, this other relationship creates a distance between the committed couple.
The situation is instantly dangerous because the involved partner does not really feel they have done any wrong. That doesn’t come until later when events catch up to them. But, right now, what’s so wrong about having a relationship with someone of the opposite sex? There isn’t anything sexual going on, so what can be wrong? But, make no mistake, these types of situations invariably lead to trouble of one kind or another.
If you fear your spouse or significant other may be entangled in an emotional affair, you should be keenly aware of how they spend their time, private and otherwise. Are they now seeking time away from you when you are both free, time you once shared? Have the become emotionally distant and reclusive? Are they disinterested when you attempt to discuss details of their personal life? And, are they spending a lot of free time away from you, even while in the same house – for instance, a lot of time on the computer in the privacy of a study or den?
Perhaps you are the one involved in the emotional affair. Or, you think you are. But, how do you know? Do you find yourself planning times the two of can get together to talk, either through email, IM, phone or in person? Are you sharing intimate details that were once formerly shared with your significant other? Does your spouse know anything about these meetings? Do you feel a sexual spark in their presence? If so, you may well be involved in an emotional affair.
There are measures you can take that offer a safeguard against an indiscretion. First, and most importantly, don’t say or anything away from you spouse or partner that you would not do in front of them. If you can follow that simple rule, you should do alright. Guard against making special time that does not involve your partner. And, include them in whatever plans to have away from home.
If you are concerned that you may have inadvertently wandered into an emotional infidelity, and would like to stop it dead in its tracks, I would strongly advise you take definitive steps to bring everything to a screeching halt before it’s all too late. And, if you asking these questions, it is not yet too late to take action before somewhere gets hurt. Because that someone could be you.
Having a tough time surviving infidelity? Visit Stan Van Sant’s site and learn more about this and other ways to guard against emotional infidelity.
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