If you approach the process of dating from a somewhat regimented position, you might find that you have a little bit more success next time than you have enjoyed recently. It’s understandable to turn to frustration, asking yourself many questions when relationship after relationship seems to fail. It’s still more understandable when you look for answers and research how others have approached this delicate problem.
There are essentially five stages to the process of dating and if you shortcut or miss out any one of those stages, you will not be in a position to succeed. The stages are all a logical progression but due to any number of external circumstances our thought process can be derailed as we are getting to know him.
The first stage that you encounter during the process of dating is, of course, the initial attraction. This is also one of the most exciting times as you try and work out whether he feels the same way, whether you are on the same page and whether you should go forward with a potential relationship. At this point, the sky is the limit.
As a relationship begins to form, elements of uncertainty are bound to follow. These ups and downs are an essential stage of the process of dating and you must not rush through them and decide that they do not count. They have every bit of right to come into your thought process, to help protect you both from getting into something too quickly, especially if it is not destined.
Uncertainty follows initial attraction, but will hopefully be followed by exclusivity. This mutual decision is based on you both deciding that the uncertainty was not warranted and that you should now begin the process of discovery in earnest.
Exclusivity allows you both to really get to know each other and it would naturally open up to the next stage in the process of dating, which is intimacy. Here you are almost certain to find mixed signals as you now begin to discover things about each other, good or bad. The information you gather here is of great importance in the long run.
All the other stages in the process of dating must be developed before you are ready to engage. Missing out on any of the stages will undoubtedly lead to failure as you have not conducted a process of “due diligence,” as they say in business! When you engage you are ready to commit to each other for a lifetime.
Don’t be tempted to skip any of the stages when you first meet that attractive guy on Saturday nights. You will both be doing each other a disservice if you try and rush things and don’t forget that the enjoyment is in the journey and not the destination!
Author Alan Bentley has a great deal of information to help you understand the the process of dating. A fantastic resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.
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